I haven’t written in quite some time (in this blog i mean)… But funny enough those little letters on the buttons of my keyboard felt very familiar, the sound of them ticking was like a rhythm, a rhythmic sound i was quite accustomed to, yet… i had not written in a longtime, written with that sense of losing myself, losing myself to the letters, the meanings and words and sentences and most of all losing myself to the world.
When i write, when anyone feels compelled to write, it’s usually out of an urge, to splurge all those thoughts running through one’s mind, running in front of those eyes and through one’s fingers…i write out of a drive, a motive, a feeling, be it a good one or perhaps a bad one, .. But most of all i write out of love, the love to share, tell my stories, tell you what i want, what i see and who i am. Self centered, that letter “i” , self centered i seem to be, self centered is a piece of being me.
Funny how amidst all my torn thoughts, some voices would appear out of nowhere, some with reason, others with doubt.. And i enter the same debate between myself, as i look into the mirror i see that same face starring back, my face (yet a different shade of blonde due to excessive playing with hair color)… and i drift away.
I usually write about my day, about the people and the actions and the stories and the drama, my fear my happiness, my never -ending excitement and my hyper self. I opened this new page to write a post about my day, yet i typed away something totally different, surprising myself, as always, the french and the pink evaporated into thin little clouds, hovering over my head, and i couldn’t remember a word he said. It feels like i was fast forwarding the whole scenery, the car service, the walk, the phone calls, the talk, the lunch, the company, the movie with a dancing swan, my drive home, the other phone call, that voice,… and now i’m just being, it’s just me typing away and munching of course those scrumptious little chocolate truffles.
hmmm…. some thoughts:
…To be individual and creative is much more important than being hip…
…Do what you believe and you will end up where you belong…
…Everything pays off at some point…
…White is the new Black…
…Think externally…
…Think collectively…
…Think about the present…
